"It is hard to make an effort to repair if every problem is the other person's fault," he wrote.
"When you hit the inevitable rough patches, will they look for ways to help or wait for you to take the blame, the whole blame, and nothing but the blame?
" He added that two renowned marriage researchers, John and Julie Gottman, have found that the key skill for a successful relationship is being able to "repair" and resolve issues together.
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"As they relate the stories of their last relationship(s) are they taking any responsibility for choosing poorly or not having the right skills at that point in their lives?